Above the Clouds
by SilverStreaksofStardust
Summary: After leaving Ogygia, things escalate from there. At first, it goes to a cupcake bakery, and then to a complete stranger's home (who clearly likes the Toronto Maple Leafs). As long as Leo and Calypso are together, then they can get through this. (post BoO)
1. The Monster With Orthopedic Shoes

**A/N:** Although this title 'Above the Clouds' is not so great, I figured it was much better than the original. (1/31/2016)

As you can see, I changed the rating from K+ to T: For those of you, who do not like this for some reason, don't read this.

 **Disclaimer:** With the exception of my own plots/OC's, etc.; Rick Riordan owns the rest (quotes, characters, etc.).

* * *

"You're that lady," Leo said. "The one who was named after Caribbean music."  
Her eyes glinted murderously. "Caribbean music."  
"Yeah. Reggae?" Leo shook his head. "Merengue? Hold on, I'll get it."  
He snapped his fingers. "Calypso!"

\- When Leo Meets Calypso, in _The House of Hades_

* * *

 **.: Above the Clouds :.**

 **1: The Monster with Orthopedic Shoes**

 _(Leo's P.O.V)_

 **The term** _'They went flying into the sunset'_ was a bit cliché, but I'm a very corny guy, so don't mind my jokes here and there. Besides, it was pretty much the truth.

Calypso's arms were wrapped around me, and I felt my heart squeeze. It was seriously amazing to finally get a girl to like me—much less trust me into taking her over ten feet off the ground with a snorting bronze dragon.

Take Jason, my best undead friend for example. He was tall and blond, and I highly contrasted with him—meaning I was short and scrawny. Girls seemed to love him, no matter what stupid things he did, and they overlook the mini-sidekick who is full of hot stuff and can tell WAY better jokes. The sidekick is me, by the way.

Oh, yeah. About that whole 'undead' thing—I died. At least I think so. But somehow, here I was, saying the dumb things I did. Maybe I'm a ghost. That will be cool, right? I could spy on people, and float through walls . . . move things with my mind. . .

Anyway, back to the topic, I was basically going (or flying, for this matter) to no place in particular. Sounds like fun, right?

"So, what trouble did you get into when I wasn't there?" Calypso asked.

I gave her a grin. "How did you know I didn't play it safe?"

"Because _I_ know _you_ ," Calypso said. ". . . Leo Valdez."

I could say that when she said my made my heart stopped, but for once that wasn't the reason why. Festus stopped rigidly in the air, as if all of his gears were locked.

"Hey, Festus," I intoned. "What is it, boy?"

Festus creaked slowly, making out several sounds.

"What did he say?" Calypso wondered.

"It means that we're going to die," I translated. "Oh, and that he sees a cupcake bakery below."

Then Festus shot down, accelerating faster and faster.

"Good news!" I shouted. "We might not be dead after all! Bad News: We'll die in less than a minute _!_ "

"So _cheerful_ ," Calypso screamed. She put her hands out, patting Festus and singing.

I seriously didn't know how that was going to help. Maybe it was a prayer song. " _Amazing Grace_ ," I sang. " _The sweet the sound_ —" I broke off when Calypso glared at me.

"First of all, we're now safe," she said, as I realized Festus was now hovering a few inches off the ground, "second of all; we really need to get you some singing lessons."

"Hey," I protested. "At least it's better than Coach Hedge."

She gave me a pitying look. "And is that any better?" She gestured to the Cupcake Bakery in front of us. "Looks like Festus was right."

My mouth started salivating. "Man, I'm hungry after _not_ dying. Will you join me inside for a cupcake?"

It looked like she was about to say no, but Calypso turned a light shade of pink. "Yes, thank you."

Festus snorted, saying, _Go ahead and enjoy. I'll just fly around to scare off some pigeons._

"Pigeons?" I asked.

 _They're annoying_. Festus flew up, and it was a miracle that no humans could see him. Maybe people thought he was a giant bird or something.

Calypso took a deep breath. "As much as I love spending time with you, I can't."

"Oh, okay," I mumbled. "If you want another guy, it's okay. I mean, seriously. I understand."

Calypso's jaw went open, and she looked less composed and more startled. "Hey! I choose _you_ , Leo." She slipped her hand into mine, and all of my emotions were jumbled up.

"Um—ah—wha—?" I said. Usually I could say something funny, (which is one of my best qualities), but I couldn't even _think_.

She laughed, her voice edged with happiness, and something else I couldn't identify. "The choices I make are horrible. But somehow, I could let the heroes who come on my island go away. I eventually did, but when I met you . . . something was different."

"I wasn't one of those chiseled guys?" I offered.

"No, because when you left, you gave me hope and I somehow _believed_ that my punishment will end because of you. It was in a prophecy."

"Prophecy?"

She rolled her eyes. "The prophecy for me getting off the island. You are _so_ annoying."

"It's my specialty." My palms started to sweat. "So, uh, should we go inside?"

"Yes." Calypso put her arms around my neck, her eyes looking into mine.

And what happened next was she kissed me. Then she had to drag me into the bakery, while I was concentrating on not letting my hands burst into flames.

"Back to the question—about why you can't be with me," I said, once I regained my cool demeanor.

"Leo, don't you see? I'm a Titaness. You're just a demigod."

"Thanks."

"You know I don't mean it like that," Calypso said, but was interrupted by a "ahem".

A woman walked towards us, and she looked odd for a waitress: green spiked hair, a nose piercing, black Goth dress, and big clunky orange shoes. Make-up was caked on her face, and I guessed she might have been in her twenties. She wore no nametag, so maybe she was a customer.

Hey, look, it's the Goth /girly version of Thalia! I almost said, but remembered Calypso didn't know who the Hunter was.

"Welcome," the girl smiled, "to Cora's Cupcake Bakery."

Calypso gave an uneasy look at me. "She looks odd," she whispered. "I have a bad feeling."

"Hey, don't offend the cupcake woman," I told her.

The lady pulled out her notepad and pencil. "What is your order for today? Choices are on the menu, up."

"What?" I dumbly looked up, and weird enough, the flavours and toppings were actually glued to the ceiling. "Uh, I'll have vanilla with chocolate frosting, sprinkles, and M&M's."

"The same as him," Calypso decided quickly, and as the lady went away, she said, "That waitress is highly suspicious."

"What's your reason? Is it because the menu is the ceiling? I won't call that distrustful—maybe weird and creative."

"No, you don't understand. I mean . . . " she faltered, clearly frustrated in lack of proof. "Look around!"

I did, spotting booths and a jukebox. They looked clean and new, so maybe this bakery opened recently. I saw a bookshelf, so I hopped over there, hoping to read something about cars. There were odd book choices—Kill All of 'Em, Tantalising Your Prey, How to Lure You Victim Using a Bakery—I wondered if it was in Ancient Greek or my dyslexia acting up. I found a zip-lock bag with ambrosia squares, behind _So You Think You Know Your Murdering Self,_ and tucked it in my jacket pocket.

"Here are your cupcakes!" the Goth Lady stepped in, her smile disappearing as she saw me. It must have been my imagination, though, because she said cheerfully, "You two are new here, so it's free of charge!"

"Oh, man! That's _awesome_. I didn't even have money anyway." I headed up to get the treat, but Calypso pulled my hand down.

She narrowed her eyes at the Waitress, revealing her accusations: "This is a strange place for a bakery to be in. It's in the middle of nowhere."

"Yeah," I agreed, figuring you should always support your girlfriend. "And what's with those orthopedic shoes? No offence, but you kind of look like a clown. "

The girl's eyes turned red, and I gulped. Right, girls don't like people insulting their fashion choices. I guess I wouldn't get my cupcake now.

"These are not orthopedic shoes—it is the latest fashion! Prepare to be destroyed!" she growled.

"Whoa, so do you own this place or something? Where's your nametag?" It was probably a stupid thing to say, given the circumstances, but usually in life-or-death situations my mind goes blank and my mouth does the talking.

The Goth pulled it out, and I read, _Ima Page_. "Wow, that's a pretty unfortunate name," I commented. "Ima Page—do kids tease you a lot?"

"It's Gem A. Pai, you idiot, and that's my _fake_ name!"

"Can you at least tell us your real name? Or is that even worse?"

Calypso face palmed, shaking her head. "Um, Leo, she's a monster."

Oh, right, that might explain a few things. I scratched my head, not feeling in the mood to fight. "Listen, Gem, or Ima Page—maybe we can help with your clothes. There might be a sale at _Forever21_ , you never know."

Apparently monsters disapproved of that clothing line, because Gem/Ima Page snarled, lunging at me.


	2. We Break Into a House and Get Caught

**A/N:** I don't know the extent of Calypso's powers, but let's just make it so that she defeats a monster.

* * *

 **2: We Break Into a House and Get Caught**

 _(Calypso's P.O.V)_

I stopped the monster by wrapping chains around its body. Normally I will be hesitant doing something like this, but this was necessary.

Leo watched in surprise, maybe not realizing that his girlfriend was kicking monster-butt. 'Gem' snarled, yet I could not indentify this type of monster. Yes, I did read the classic books—like _Demonology_ and _Monsters of Greek Mythology_ , or _How to Defeat the Beasts_ —but I've been stuck on the island for a while, never expecting to be free from Ogygia.

"Do you have any celestial bronze?" I asked Leo.

"Um, no. I have Festus and my tool belt, though." The fire-bender glanced over to the monster. "Hey, dude, we're just going to escape on Happy the Dragon, yeah?" Then he grabbed my hand, and we both ran outside.

The girl behind us growled, already out of its bonds. She moved fast, grabbing Leo by his tool belt.

"Hey! Festus!" the son of Hephaestus screamed. "Emergency—weird girl about to kill me!"

I picked up a stick lying by, and swatted it over the head of Gem. "Let go of my boyfriend, you psycho!"

The monster did, but unfortunately turned her anger on me, scratching me in the eyes. I stumbled back, blinking furiously. The monster's talons were sharp, maybe with poison in them, because acid burned in my eyes.

"Calypso!" I could hear Leo shouted. He was a blurry figure as he raced over to me, but Gem swatted him to the ground.

"I—I can't see!" I cried. Panic filled inside my stomach, and I pleaded for my eyesight to return. I was a Titaness—I should be able to heal quickly.

A loud roar rumbled over, and I knew it was Festus. I could hear the dragon land on the ground, and high screams coming from the monster as it was flamed to ashes.

The loud ringing in my ears made a painful headache, and I slumped to the ground, slipping in unconsciousness.

* * *

"Calypso? Can you hear me? Say "Leo is the most awesome guy in the universe"."

I groaned, forcing my eyes open. I could see blurry figures, but that was all. "Leo, shut up."

"Hm, close enough. You were knocked out cold and Festus saved the day. I carried you on the dragon, and we flew to a safer place."

I blindly felt for his hand, and he put something in it. "W-What is this?"

"Ambrosia. I found it in the bakery behind a book. Good thing I went there, right? Oh, and I made you a pop tart—I found them in the cupboard, and I was like, _Why not_?"

"Cupboard? Please don't tell me we broke into someone's home."

"Come on, it was empty! Well, technically. The owner is in the bathroom, taking a shower. Thankfully he's stopped singing _Moves Like Jagger_."

I ate the given food, which tasted of _galaktoboureko_ , reminding me of the Greek treat I loved so much when I was younger. I think my eyesight was a little better—I could see Leo's eyes, which I was grateful for. They were filled with love and the usual sparkle of mischief in them.

"So, here's the plan," he said. "We tie up the guy up when he leaves the bathroom and lock him in the basement, therefore giving us a chance to raid his food and spend a night of rest."

"Or maybe we could just explain we need provisions and shelter?" I suggested. "Leo, we are _not_ going to lock the man up in his _own_ house!"

"Your choice, sunshine." The son of Hephaestus shrugged. "Hey, maybe you can do Mist! Unless if you don't feel up to that," he quickly added. "Are you tired?"

Admittedly, I was, but I couldn't let him down. "I feel fine now. The ambrosia worked really well." And it did, the room coming in clear sight. There were posters of the Toronto Maple Leafs—I only knew that because it said on the posters. The walls were a matching blue, and the bed underneath me was white and red.

Leo inclined his head to the side. "Oh, great—now he's singing _Edge of Glory_. He's ruining the song for me!"

"Then don't listen to him," I said. "By the way, where is Festus?"

"Oh, he's on top of the roof," he said dismissively. "You should have a tour with me around the house! It's incredible—I chose a really great place."

"Which is?"

"A big mansion! Of course, I didn't know they had those in Canada. We're in Vancouver, BC."

"What are you _DOING_?"

Leo and I looked to the doorway, seeing a man, face red with anger. This must have been the owner, because he was wearing a Toronto Maple Leafs baseball cap. He had blond hair and steely brown eyes, reminding me of someone familiar. . . With a weathered face, he looked about in his thirties.

"Quick, let's tie him up!" Leo yelped.

I ignored him, trying to hold a steady, reasonable voice. "Hi, my name is Calypso. This is my boyfriend, Leo Valdez. We ran—" I paused, not knowing what else to say.

Leo took over for me. "We ran away from a monster, which was chasing us down. It hit Calypso, who went unconscious. We could barely escape until our friend Festus came. With nowhere to go, we found your _wonderful_ home and decided to ask if we could stay over. I apologize for our intrusion, but I was worried about Calypso. Did I mention you have a wonderful home?"

I gaped. Even though it sounded great, the fact that Leo spilled about our adventure was bad. Now this guy will think we're mental, and throw us out or worse—call the authorities. I braced myself.

Instead, the Toronto Maple Leafs Man gave us a sympathetic look. "Of course you can stay."


	3. Yeah, There's a Dog On Your Roof

**A/N** : Thanks for you guys who favourite, followed and reviewed! It encouraged me so much!

The guy's name is weird, because I didn't want to offend anyone. If there actually is someone named Herbert Mint, which is a weird concurrence, I'm sorry.

* * *

 **3: Yeah, There's a Dog on Your Roof—Deal With It**

 _(Leo's P.O.V)_

Even though you thought I blew it, there's one thing you need to know: The truth can sound so ridiculous, that people let it slide. And as you could see, I didn't mention the words 'mythology' or 'dragon'. Hey, I am dumb sometimes, but not completely stupid. My girlfriend looked like she was about to kill me, but luckily the stranger kept me safe.

"So, er, my name is Hebert Mint," he said.

" _Hahahahaha_!" I laughed, pointing. "Nice joke, dude, because if your name is actually Herbert Mint, that name is _so_ —" Calypso kicked me in the shin "—Amazing," I finished. "In fact, I'm not really Leo Valdez. My name is Dumbledore Gandalf Twinkie Strawberry." Sorry, but I have an obsession with wizards and food.

Herbert looked at Calypso wearily, as if going down this road before. "He's making fun of me, isn't he?"

"Um . . ." Calypso looked worried, remembering that this guy was offering us a night over. "That _is_ his name. In fact, we call him _Leo Valdez_ because it's _Idiotnese_ for Dumbledore Strawberry."

" _Idiotnese_? Is that a language?"

Herbert was actually serious, not at all aware of the lies from us. "Yeah," I said smoothly. "We come from Idiot-Ville; population only twelve million. Actually, we flew over to here and coincidently saw your house.'"

"May I please visit Idiot-Ville sometime? Oh, and what's my name in idiotnese?"

I exchanged a look with Calypso, who forced a smile on her face, replying, "Ronald Mango."

"Do people's last names end in a fruit?"

Before I could answer to that, a loud boom thumped on the roof. _Oh, man, what is Festus doing?_ I raced outside, with the other two running behind me.

Mortals view the Greek Mythology world into some reasonable things, because of Mist, the veil covering the magical world, like a dragon on the roof into a—

"Holy crap, is that a _golden retriever_ on top of my house?"

"Why, Festus, what are you doing up there?" I said. "Bad dog! Come down this instance!"

Festus cocked his head at me, confused, but flew down.

Herbert looked like he was about to faint. "That dog jumped down a big height! W-What is—"

"We're from the circus. In fact, Calypso, Festus, and I are tired. We'll like to sleep now."

* * *

Our sleeping arrangement was weird. At least, that's how I will put it. I personally asked Herbert for an extra bed for Festus, but he just stared. It was a shame he couldn't vision a four-hundred pound bronze dragon. Once he went in his own bedroom, I looked over to Calypso. "Here's the thing. We can't put Festus on the roof, because there are pigeons looking for revenge. And he doesn't want to sleep on the floor—only a bed."

Festus snorted. _It's been a while since I got to sleep on a springy mattress. You know how hard it is, flying?_

"Hmmm, good point!" I nodded my head. "But I'm not the one who ate the pigeon, thus sending a flock to chase me!"

Calypso didn't even blink. "Easy, Festus can get his own bed, which hopefully he doesn't break, and you and I can share one."

I coughed, flushing. "What? Calypso, we're just a couple! I mean, I know you want me, but don't you think we're rushing into things?"

"Leo Valdez!" Her face was as red as mine. "I wasn't implying anything. I just meant so we could—you know what? You can sleep on the floor." She tossed me a blanket and pillow at my face.

"Hey! Come on, Sunshine, I was just kidding!"

 _Smooth_ , Festus observed. He curled his body on the bed, eyes closing. Miraculously, the bed didn't even creak. Maybe Festus stopped eating those doves.

The lights turned off, and I wrapped the blanket around myself and pillow under my head. "Goodnight, Calypso," I said.

There was a moment of silence, before the voice I was waiting to hear replied back, "Goodnight, Dumbledore Strawberry."

 _Aw, stop flirting! There's a dragon in this room_ , Festus grumbled.

"Have a great rest, man," I said. "I appreciate you helping us. I mean, we've been through a lot together. I'm glad you didn't die."

 _Me too . . . and the girl you picked up? She's really cool._

I grinned at that. Yeah, she was.


	4. Mint Murders Me

**A/N:** I know this is in Leo's point of view . . . again. Why not? Who doesn't love the funny son of Hephaestus?

Hmm, I just realized that Festus and Leo communicate by Morse Code. I'll make changes for this story after it's completed.

Thanks to you guys who favourited, followed, reviewed.

Shout-out to the reviewers (alphabetical order): CrazyBlueOwl (Thanks for doing 2 reviews!), DemiTribute, Geeky Chic Chick, PiperMcLean4Ever, SASSY NINJA CHICKEN (Interesting name, btw), storysupporter, sickly-wicked

* * *

 **4: Mint Murders Me**

 _(Leo's P.O.V)_

The next morning, I felt someone shaking my shoulder.

"Leo? Are you okay?"

"Huh? Uh, of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?"

"You were moaning in your sleep. Did you have a bad dream?"

"Why, yes I did, Mommy. Bad guys were chasing me with axes in their hands! Did I mention that _All About That Bass_ was playing in the background?"

Calypso crossed her arms across her chest, not at all amused with my sarcasm.

"Okay, fine, Sunshine. It wasn't a nightmare, but more of a weird dream. When we went back to Camp Half-Blood, Herbert was there, saying in a Darth Vader voice, _'I have come to destroy you and all your loved ones'_."

"Well, I think that means you don't trust him." She looked thoughtful. "In fact, it was pretty strange—he let two strangers stay."

"And a dog. But that doesn't explain that much. I mean, he clearly doesn't see through the Mist. And he is pretty gullible—why on earth will there be a place called Idiot-ville? I'm telling you, we're dealing with a not-so bright person. The name Herbert Mint doesn't scream out villain."

Festus yawned, snorting to me, _That was the best sleep I had in ages._

A knock on the door brought all of us alert.

"Everybody decent?" Herbert asked.

"No, my dog is still in his underwear!" I called back. "I just need to pull clothes on him." In a softer voice, I added sheepishly, "Sorry, I couldn't help it," to my girlfriend.

The Titaness shook her head. "If you have any suspicious thoughts on Herbert, we should fly out of the window."

Festus nodded in agreement. He stretched out his wings, as Calypso opened the door.

"So, uh, I made breakfast. Scrambled eggs, sausages, and French Toast."

My mouth salivated. "Does it come with whipped cream and Maple Syrup?"

Calypso gave me a warning look.

"Hey, I'm trying to stall," I shrugged back. "So, uh, Herbert—did you bring any orange juice?"

"No, I'll go get it." The sound of footsteps slowly decreased the assumption of Herbert gone to get OJ.

"Now's our chance!" Calypso paused. "Um, Festus, can you get through the window?"

Festus snorted. _Of course I can!_ He stuck his head out, but that's as far as his body will go.

"You know what's weird? This scene is so predictable," I commented. "We can't get out the window, and before we rush outside, Herbert will be back."

"I'm back!"

"What did I tell you?" I opened the door, figuring even if Herbert was a killer, its two demigods and a dragon against a mortal.

"Here's your food!" Herbert smiled, with an evil glint in his eye. Then he produced a knife out of his hoodie, and pointed it at Festus. "Nobody move, or the dragon get's it!"

"I knew it!" I cried. "Well, I suspected, and then denied it."

Calypso frowned. "Go ahead, then. Kill the dragon."

"What?" My mouth dropped open. "Calypso—"

"If you do, you'll regret it," she continued. "My guess is that you're afraid of us. You won't have the guts to murder, will you?"

"I—I—" Herbert wavered, then pointed the knife to a new target: me.

"No, seriously, dude, we're not creepy! I mean, sure, I lied about some things . . . my name isn't Dumbledore Gandalf Twinkie Strawberry, but give us a second chance! We could all be friends."

"You're all monsters!" Herbert protested, and in a slow motion, before I could register it, blood began pouring out of my chest.

Startled, I looked at the Mortal, who trembled and then stabbed himself. Herbert went down, the darkness gone from his eyes and replaced with happiness.

"Leo!" Calypso ran to me. "Gods, Leo . . ."

My body felt numb, and I couldn't feel any pain. At least not at the moment. "Ca—Calypso," I said. "I don't even—"

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. "This is my fault. It's my entire fault."

I tried to smile, and make a joke, but instead shivered.


	5. Blueberry Eggo Waffles & an Empty House

**5: Blueberry Eggo Waffles and an Empty House**

 _(Calypso's P.O.V)_

I woke up, the light staring right into my face. _Styx_ , I forgot to put the blinds down. Since I was wide-awake, I looked around to see any danger. Right, we were in the spare bedroom. In a stranger's house.

 _"_ _I have come to destroy you and all your loved ones_ ," Leo muttered.

"What?" I looked over to him, but his eyes were closed. He was sleeping, and all I could think was, _Gods, he's so cute when he's asleep._ Hmm, I guess he always talks even if he's NOT awake.

 _"_ _My dog is still in his underwear."_

Of course, he says the most peculiar things. . . "Leo," I said, "you might want to wake up before you say something you might regret."

Festus said something with Morse code, but I couldn't understand. He huffed, though, and maybe figured out that the dog-in-his-underwear thing was a reference to him.

" _MONSTER_!" Leo yelled. "No, I'm not. I don't even—I don't understand—" he shot up, his eyes looking right into mine.

My throat went dry. He looked absolutely scared, and so vulnerable, but slowly his eyes softened and he had that usual smile.

"Bad dream," he explained. "My mistake. I shouldn't have eaten that blueberry eggo waffle last night."

"Um, Leo? You didn't eat a blueberry eggo waffle yesterday."

"Well, eating a fictitious waffle is the only explanation for a bad dream."

Festus snorted.

Leo ignored the dragon, picking up the pillow he used and threw it on the bed. "We should probably leave. Preferably right now."

"Maybe Mr. Mint could lend us breakfast—" I began, but was cut off.

" _Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious_!" the son of Hephaestus blurted out. "Uh, I mean, we shouldn't wait for breakfast. I think we can catch the flight to Camp-Half Blood. Let's board the Festus Airlines! Meaning, we go on the dragon to locate the camp."

I studied him. There was some anxiety; that I could tell. Something was off with Leo, and I was hurt that he wouldn't tell me. "Leo," I said quietly, "what's wrong?"

Biting his lip, Leo relented. "It's about my friends."

"You think that we would not get along." It slipped out as a statement instead of a question.

"Nah, I'm just thinking about our arrival. What if my friends aren't glad to see me? I mean, I was annoying and all, but . . ."

"Your friends will be happy to see you. I mean, you're one of those people that everyone wants to be around."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. You're funny, charming, amazing –"

"And hot," he supplied. "Thanks for boosting up my self-esteem. I needed it."

"I'm not just saying these things. I mean them. With all my heart."

"Ah." Leo's face turned bright red, which made me smirk. I think he was incapable of preparing our flight, so I led him and Festus out the front door.

* * *

I wanted to thank Herbert for letting us stay, but he wasn't awake at this hour. While I put Leo and Festus outside, they waited for me to find the 'Toronto Maple Leafs Guy'. Leo insisted on coming with me, but I explained it will be quick.

Maybe I could write on a sticky note and hang it on the fridge. As I searched for a pen, the house was strangely quiet.

Curiously, I passed Herbert's room and knocked on the door. There was no sound, so I twisted it open. I could already think of the stupid clichés forming into my mind. Herbert staring at me creepily; walking in on him doing something that should stay unmentionable; or . . .

The room was empty. Literally. The walls were bare, closet empty, no beds or furniture. It was as if Herbert Mint never existed.

And that was when I heard maniacal laughter behind me. Sighing, I turned around and said, "Leo, I told you specifically to stay _outside_."

"Come on, Princess, you know I don't follow the rules. I'm a Bad Boy."

I pushed him outside the room and closed the door behind us. "He's not in here."

"I kind of figured. You know, with everything gone from the house and all . . ."

 _"_ _Everything_?" That was when I noticed that there were no couches in the living room, no refrigerator in the kitchen, or even the Welcome Mat on the doorstep. "I just saw the refrigerator –"

"I suspect," Leo said grimly, "that Herbert Mint is not who he says he is."

* * *

 **A/N** : Yep, people, I did eat blueberry eggo waffles while writing this. Just to clarify once more: Herbert Mint is not a murderer. That was just in Leo's dream. Although he definitely is suspicious. Oh, and turns out we still have more chapters coming.

And, yeah, Leo's dream about a dream was in his dream.


	6. Are Those Pigeons Attacking Us?

**A/N** : It's Friday the thirteenth! Strange enough, my day was pretty awesome.

* * *

 **6: Are Those . . . Pigeons Attacking Us?**

 _(Calypso's P.O.V)_

As we went on Festus, Leo kept humming. The tune was kind of strange, and off-key, but I didn't mind it. I could make out flats and it was slightly haunting. "What are you humming?" I asked.

"The Game of Thrones theme song!" he said. "Just wait until I introduce you to TV, Wii's, and other gaming devices!"

"I'm not foreign," I said, amused.

"If you say so." He steered Festus, and we were in the sky once more.

"How do you find Camp Half-Blood?" I asked.

"With a newly installed, upgraded GPS! Which I don't have, by the way."

I couldn't help but smile. Leo always rubbed hs enthusiasm off of people, and gave me—

"Pigeons!" Leo yelled.

"Um, what?"

Festus said something, and Leo shook his head disapprovingly.

"What's happening?" I asked.

"It turns out that Festus upset a whole flock and now they're getting their revenge," Leo explained quickly, shooting another Look at Festus.

"So pigeons are getting their revenge on a fire-breathing dragon? How is that supposed to work out?"

Festus made a series of noise.

"These are not just any ordinary birds," Leo translated. "They're evil. And they're right behind us."

I looked behind me, and sure enough, there they were. "Well, fly higher!" I said. "They can't reach as high as we can."

"Okay, Festus, let's go ABOVE THE CLOUDS!"

Festus raised up, but it was weird, because the pigeons still followed us higher.

"That's not possible!" I protested. "Birds can't—"

"Can I remind you that they're evil?"

I saw one pigeon give me an evil eye—yeah, apparently they can give you those. Another one pecked on the dragon's tail, and Festus snorted in alarm.

"Festus! Turn around—you can breathe fire!" Leo said. "Oh, right, I can do fire, too."

The air up here was blowing hard against us, and it didn't seem like the gods or goddesses were on our side. Festus struggled to turn around, and now a swarm of pigeons began attacking us. They were pecking, squawking, and there was a downfall of feathers raining on us.

Festus roared in outrage, and I put my hands tighter around Leo's waist.

"Hold on, Princess," Leo warned to me.

Suddenly, Festus did a full backflip/somersault move, and spewed out fire.

It was a horrifying, yet an amazing sight. The pigeons were barbecued, and dropped down one by one. A nearby bird poured monster goo on us, but landed out box.

Leo grabbed the box, studying it intently. "Nice."

I looked at the box, nodding my head. "Those birds were monsters."

"At least we learnt something," Leo said.

"What's that?"

He grinned. "Never anger a pigeon."

* * *

 **A/N** : There is no discrimination against pigeons. The author wants to make it clear that she herself does not mind these birds, but it is only for the purpose in this humourous fanfic to make them evil.

No pigeons were in harm of making this chapter.


	7. Safe and Sound (For Now)

**A/N** : Last chapter! Come to think of it, this was my first ever fanfic on this website.

17/05/2016

* * *

 **7: Safe and Sound (for Now)**

A large shadow hung over Camp Half-Blood, causing demigods who were outside to definitely notice.

The expressions on the half-blood's faces were almost comical—gaping looks: wide eyes and jaws opened.

Finally, one person had recovered from shock ad uttered two single words: "Fruit Loops!"

Indeed there was. The coloured, artificially flavoured cereal dropped to the ground, like rain from the heavens.

The shape above was not a UFO, like what one of the demigods below thought, but a bronze dragon.

The riders on the dragon? It was an odd sight. A girl with a white dress on, like there was a simple event she was going to, and a braid once was carefully neat and tied but now with flyaways. The boy seated in front of her was dressed in messy attire, as if he wore the clothes for a whole week. They looked like opposites, but seemed to _fit_.

The boy held down a box of Fruit Loops, which somehow kept pouring out endlessly.

"That's right! I'm not dead!" he yelled, but most people couldn't hear him.

Only a nearby satyr could, and to him, it sounded like: _Cat's light! I'm on meds!_

 _Ohhh, boy, there's a lunatic_ , the satyr thought, while doodling an anime mushroom kissing a purple pineapple.

* * *

 _(Leo's P.O.V)_

"Hey, it's Voldemort Pomegranate and Hermione Banana!"

Without even blinking, or tossing a bewildered look, the son of Jupiter smiled. "Dude! You're back! How—"

"Believe me, it wasn't easy," I told him. "We had many run-ins with monsters."

"Not to mention Leo broke into a mortal's home," Calypso added.

Piper regarded me, a stern look on her face. She then punched me, hard, in my shoulder.

"Ouch!" I grimaced. "You punch like a girl."

"And _you_ scream like a girl."

"Touché."

Piper attacked me with a hug, while I protested, "Okay, I was just kidding. You punch very macho."

"Well, I wasn't kidding about you screaming like a girl." Piper pulled away. "Leo, I thought you were gone. But now you're here … "

"And brought Fruit Loops! Oh, and this is Calypso, my girlfriend."

Behind me, a person was stammering.

" _Calypso_?" Percy managed to say. "H-how—I'm sorry—"

"It's okay, Percy," Calypso said. "I'm sorry, too."

I regarded my girlfriend, and then my sort-of-friend. "You guys have a story to tell me?"

"Yes, but right now, I think we should rest." The Titaness shook her head. "I _still_ can't believe we started our adventure in a cupcake bakery!"

"Hey, stick with me, and maybe we can even start an adventure against Dora the Explorer."

"Um . . . what?" Piper, Jason, Calypso, and Percy all said at the same time.

"What I'm trying to say is, I may be weird, funny, and sometimes not use my head—but I love you, Calypso, and you make me realize that people are better than machines." I considered my words. "Well, almost."

Piper sniffed. "That is _so_ adorable!"

"Wait, so you previously thought machines were better than people?" Percy scratched his head.

* * *

Hephaestus watched one of his sons return heroically on a dragon. He wiped a tear from his eye, thinking, _What a beautiful entrance_.

It turns out that Leo Valdez was a hero. Even if he wasn't, the blacksmith god will still be proud of him.

"Look how far you came," he muttered. And so he placed his Toronto Maple Leafs hat on his head, the symbol replaced with the words _Hephaestus_ and a forge sign.

* * *

 **A/N** : *Keep in mind that I edit my stories after I completed them. Any mistakes throughout this fanfic is mine, although it'll be revised in the future*

I will give you all Blackberry Ginger Ale, because you deserve it! You don't like that drink? Well, whatever you prefer. I'm so happy that you guys stuck with me throughout this story, despite my laziness.

Thank you to all who reviewed, favourited, followed!

Shout-out to the reviewers: SASSY NINJA CHICKEN, Geekly Chi Chick, PiperMcLean5Ever, CrazyBlueOwl (times 3), sickly-wicked, DemiTribute, storysupporter, Diamant, EllaAnnieGrace, TheMasterTrident13, Ayano's Theory of Relativity, Guest, CookieUnicorn

Thank you so much for encouragement. If you want a cool name in Idiotnese, here's a generator for you: (Harry Potter Character name), (Fruit). For example: Lavender Watermelon.

P.S: Personally, I don't know much about hockey teams, and the Toronto Maple Leafs was my friend's favourite team, so ... yeah. I just chose that randomly. Also, I know that Hephaestus probably doesn't have an anagrammed hat or whatever, but hey, it was vital to this story.


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